It’s hard. You know it’s hard but I’m not trying to undermine your thoughts. It should be simple and in the minds of most people who have never had an addiction, it is a simple thing. I’m craving vast amounts of alcohol again. I find myself on different websites adding things to the basket but never actually going through with it. Just one last drink I tell myself, pure and utter lies, if I let myself have one then I will want three after that. I guess I just needed a moan. I stopped myself so I do have control over it. Smoking for over 30 years and somehow have switched 100% over to vaping. The addiction doesn’t come close to how hard it was to do that.
I know it’s not a great switch from cig to pipe but it was and is the start of starting a new chapter, Where I am well enough to take the kids out, that the panic attacks will down. Wel. I keep telling myself that, eventually, there will be a day with no reliance on anything. I’ll make a list and do a poll on there to see which direction to which to try first,
A very young me, my Uncle Henk, Oma, and Oma (dutch grandparents) before a fishing session in the lape and canal behind Henks; house. This photo brings back memories especially now that they are both long dead. We would have genuine calls saying hello, hope you are well, and things, It was always brief as Oma doesn’t know any English.
Anyways be awesome to each other.
3 responses to “Black dog is chasing me down”
One day at a time brother, that is how sobriety is done so they say, but they never mention that sometimes sobriety is done one hour at a time, or one minute. Reach out to a sober friend or sponsee when necessary, remember that everyone struggles with sobriety at one point or another. You got this.
Thank you- sorry its taken so long to reply. Just wanted to say that your words helped. I did reach out and it did help, Thanks again.
Happy to be a part of your process and I am very happy to hear you are doing better. I’m only an ocean and a continent, or maybe a email, if you want to talk.