I’m trying to sleep but I’m struggling. I don’t want the Valium as I’ll just get hung over again like I was all this morning. It’s fine when you have nothing to do the next day but I’ve got stuff that needs to get done

Problem one: I need to wake up at or before 9:30 a.m. to speak to Mental Health services about seeing the consultant for an assessment. I can’t for the life of me figure out what for. Is there some magic wand or stick he points at me and poof suddenly I’m okay again. I’m depressed because I lost my independence with FND crippling me, my wife left, living in a motel while the council find me a flat and yeah to me that is a lot going which explains the depression. Am I thinking of killing myself? yes but that’s just thoughts, I’m not taking active steps in following through on plans. So back to the question at hand. Why do I need to see him? My meds are fine, don’t mess with them they are working. If I wanted a chat I’d call the mental health helpline.

Problem two: I need to find a laundrette that collects my dirty washing and drops it off all nice and clean. There are no facilities here to wash your clothes which is fair enough. Unless I wait till Wednesday and wash them while I’m at Doti’s house. My house. The house, old house. And use the machine we have there. It’s only two loads so should have it done by home time. Unless I come on Tuesday and stay, but then I need to be at the office. Hmm. I’ll find a laundrette and get it sorted. I think my social worker found one…. I remember he did and texted me the number. So will ring them and see what the deal is.

Problem three: Meeting with a social worker. I can’t remember which one I’m meeting (currently 3) tomorrow and where. Usually, it’s a place just down the road from where I used to live. There are offices there and even a cafe inside. All are hidden behind the main street. I know it’s at 1 pm. So mass text would be the solution.

Problem four: Insomnia. No caffeine drinks after 7 p.m. Make an appointment with the doctor.

Problem five: Exercise. Part of the recovery is to get the strength back in my body to move around. I can hobble a short distance but need to find a way of doing it but seating is available every hundred feet or so. That way I woke fall over and collapse. I would love to walk down the main road and do it but I checked today and there are no benches. Maybe a park would be better. I’ll have a look online and see if there are any good ones. I think there is one with a lake that has benches along it so I could try that.

Thank you for reading my boring list of chores. I’ll attempt to sleep now. It’s warm. There is no breeze. Agh.