That is two dogs now. Both were rescued from Poland and are now being fussed over and played with constantly. That’s me on the left as well. Dobby, the lovely hound on the left has just joined us. She is doing well apart from terrorizing the cat, but Bella now has a sanctuary upstairs.

Things are plodding along at the moment. I ran out of medication on Friday for a chronic pain condition and didn’t get any medication till mid-morning on Monday. The withdrawal effects were real and terrible. I’m p pretty sure it’s what triggered the mental health issues I’ve been having all weekend and, well, up until now. They are still there. Racing and intrusive thoughts. I’d read up on a mindfulness-type method of trying to distract yourself via counting objects.

So far so good with that one. You just pick something that you are going to count and you count away! I’ve found it takes a lot out of me after a while though. Having to focus on that then all of a sudden you can hear two thoughts at once so you double down your efforts and end up with a screaming headache at the end of it.

I managed to do violent sobbing yesterday morning, which is a new one for me. I’ve done angry crying but this was the next level. The dogs were confused but started licking me so I guess they wanted me to stop. In a nutshell, I was getting very frustrated with a relatively newly diagnosed chronic pain problem that I have to live with for life and it was the first time I realized the effect it has on me, my wife, and the kids. Well. Pretty much anyone in my life. Trying to think about what the future will be like and what I can do to make things better. The problem with that is looking at the future and realizing the burden you’ve become and that you don’t want to be that.

I’ve been playing with the latest chatbot over the past few days. Throwing different things at it to see what the response is. Namely, about Ukraine and what the global consensus is. Trying to stretch it but yeah, it’s been fun. Then I started asking questions about brass pipework and how much force is needed to blow the pipe apart, then electrical fuses and fireworks. It was at this point I realized I should stop trying to get chatbot weaponized or producing munitions. All fun and games!

Hope everyone has been well and hopefully will post more often as I get the chance 🙂 All the above to one side, I am functioning, I am working and I am living.